Baaaallin’! As a result of the just-announced divorce settlement between rapper Nas, who made one good album 15 years ago, and his ex-wife Kelis (the reason you change the station when you hear “my milkshake brings…”), he’ll have to pay her FIFTY-FIVE GRAND A MONTH until he runs out of money TWO MONTHS FROM NOW. READ MORE I mean “read more”:
In addition, Nas has also to pick up the house note (this is what rappers call a mortgage payment), pay for a a baby nurse (this is what divorcees call a way to squeeze more money out of their exes) and give 35 GRAND to Kelis‘ divorce lawyer.
Time to re-re-master and re-re-release Illmatic!