Hey, here’s an idea to drive up holiday shopping: stop playing Christmas music all damn month. Nothing makes me want to stop spending money faster than hearing “The Little Drummer Boy,” and I’m referring to every known recorded version. I don’t care if David Bowie’s singing it. Just play “Rebel, Rebel” and have the manager say, “Happy Holidays from Trader Joe’s” at the end. (Yes, I do my holiday shopping at Trader Joe’s. I hit the bottle pretty hard all December they’ve got an array of cheap wines and vodkas and bread.)
Bob Dylan, or Robert Zimmerman if you want to be all birth certificate about it, has joined the long list of Jews to put out a Christmas album, and the Los Angeles Times has an article detailing other Yids who’ve honored this holiday by trying to wrest a couple bucks from its adherents, like Barbara Streisand and Barry Manilow. It also links to this list of Jews who’ve written Christmas songs. And if you want a complete list of music financed by Jews, click here.
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