This Would Sound Impossible If It Didn’t Involve Joe Jackson

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Sources say that the indestructible Joe Jackson is determined to wrest cash from MJ’s kids the only way he knows how: making them sing and dance for the people. UK’s The Sun quotes Jackson biographer Ian Halperin as saying: “Joe wants the children to go on a world tour in 2010. He has also already offered recording contracts to two of Michael’s kids.”

Which two?! Paris has the most famous face (that’s what five seconds in front of two billion people will do for you), but Prince and Prince have the same name. They could open the show with a rendition of the Spin Doctors’ “Two Princes.” No, that’s ridiculous. They should close with it. Or they could bill the show as “Prince and Paris” without specifying which Prince you’re going to get, so that the two boys could trade off their role in the show every other night while using their free days to complete elementary school.

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