Dammit, why does MTV have to be as censorious when profiling Lil’ Wayne on its website as they are on their television network?! It’s the internet; you don’t have to worry about the scumbags in the Parents Television Council running to the Nazis in the FCC. Here, I’ll prove it: fuck. Jesus is imaginary. See? […]
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If I Wanted to Hear Lil’ Wayne Without Profanity, I’d Listen to the Stuff He Recorded When He Was 12
Tiger Thought Affairs Were A “Perk”
Hey, some may say “transgressions,” Tiger says “perks!” According to a news report in The Daily Mail, Tiger Woods thinks that his cheating ways were just a part of the job. O-Kayyyyy. A longtime “friend” tells the News: “In his own mind, he may not have thought he was doing anything wrong. He was under […]
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Brittany Murphy’s Husband Breaks His Silence
Brittany Murphy‘s husband Simon Monjack has finally broken his silence and he says: “My world was destroyed yesterday.” Monjack noted that the day of Brittany’s death had just been a “regular” day and that she was sick and tired after completing two movies. Says Monjack: “[Her mother] Sharon went into the bathroom because she had […]
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Oh, Man! Marmaduke is One Cool Dog, Dawg!
Marmaduke the movie! YESSSS! I bet the reason it took so long to bring it to the bring screen is that they didn’t want to disappoint all the hardcore fans with a lackluster adaptation, like with how it took decades to make Lord of the Rings or how they haven’t made a movie out of […]
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It Takes More Than Saying “Hey, Come to My Party” to Get the Jersey Shore Kids at Your Party
You’d think all it would take to get Mike “The Situation” and Pauly D from MTV’s Jersey Shore to show up at your party would be a cooler full of Smirnoff Ice; or a chance to be photographed next to an MMA fighter; or telling them it’ll be during the day, outside, in the sun; […]
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EXCLUSIVE!!! Eric Dane May In Fact Be a Federal Boobies Inspector
McSextape himself, Eric Dane, was spotted wearing an FBI hat as he entered a house in Los Angeles without a warrant. Starzlife was there.
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Aww, C’mon, Let Jon Gosselin Have a Gun. Please
Uh, hell-o, NRA, what am I paying my annual dues for? Did Thomas Jefferson die during the Civil War for naught? To the best of my knowledge, Jon Gosselin isn’t a felon or 16 years old, so why did a judge just ban him from having handguns at his Berks County house? Because he was […]
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Rage Against the Machine Sell a Lot of Music to Computers
Score, Marxists! Rage Against the Machine, the band for people who hate both capitalism and their parents, has prevented X Factor winner Joe McElderry from taking the top spot on the British singles chart. To contextualize for Americans: in England, Simon Cowell launched The X Factor after retiring Pop Idol. The show’s winner has taken […]
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Asher Roth Isn’t ‘Gay’ Gay, Just the Lame Kind
If you’re from any major American city, you’re familiar with at least one Jew who listens exclusively to gangster rap, uses drug dealer-inspired slang, and raps along to Cam’Ron while driving with the bass amped up and windows down. In fact, you’re reading a blog post written by one right now. The difference, of course, […]
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From Trapped to Back in the Trap: T.I. to Walk?
King of the South, T.I., who is currently locked down for attempting to cop to a small arsenal of fully automatic weapons, might be getting sprung from the clink three months earlier than expected. Here’s hoping that T.I. doesn’t let his most recent bid dissuade him from going right back to gangster rap. His last […]